Josette and Justin turned the Exponent's 25 Things to Do at Purdue Before You Graduate into a meme. Ones I've done in bold, the Exponent's text in italics, my comments in [brackets].
25 Things to Do at Purdue Before You Graduate
- Run through the fountain - Purdue almost ended this tradition, but not before outraged alumni and a giant metal cylinder saved it. Playing in Purdue's fountains is a tradition that's here to stay. [Whee! What? You can't run through the Engineering fountain anymore? That's... unAmerican!]
- Go sledding on Slayter Hill - Don't have a sled? Don't worry, popular substitutes include lunch trays, laundry baskets and garbage bags. [... and car hoods. Which is very dangerous, if you run into anyone else. So don't do it.]
- Spend the day at Harry's Chocolate Shop - Going to Purdue and not going to Harry's is like going to the ocean and not getting wet. Whether you drink or not, Harry's is a Purdue institution. [Josette isn't counting this one because she's just "been there a few times" but I am counting it because I've spent at least 24 hours there, if not all in a row.]
- Dress up for Breakfast Club - Take advantage of that leisure suit in your parent's closet and join the party. What else is there to do at 6 on a Saturday morning? [I know it's hard to believe, given the lush I am these days, but I didn't really start drinking until I was 25. And by the time you're 25, dressing up in a costume to go drinking madrugada seems a little silly. Also, I'm not sure if in my day people dressed up quite as much as they do now.]
- Shake President Jischke's hand - A tireless promoter of all things Boilermaker, seek him out, shake his hand and thank him for his guidance. [And here we hit the first thing on the list that simply post-dates my time at Purdue (extended as it was) -- it was President Beering the whole time I was there. And I never shook his hand, either.]
- Eat Thanksgiving dinner at the residence hall - Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes. Usually held on the Thursday before Thanksgiving, it's the kind of meal you write home about. [I lived in the dorms for two years and worked food service both years (I was a waiter captain the second year -- yay me!) so I'm sure I worked these meals.]
- Attend a women's basketball game - Even though the football and men's basketball teams get most of the attention, the women's basketball team is the real deal. [And I kept meaning to, but... didn't.]
- Write a letter to the editor - Want to be heard on campus? Write a letter to the editor of the Exponent. No topic's taboo - squirrels, homosexuality and politics are always popular. [Never did -- but that reminds me that National Velveeta founder Phil Granchi (later an Annoyance Theater collaborator) and Crazy Monkeys co-founder Shaun Himmerick were both Exponent columnists. Phil's columns were really good...]
- Attend Grand Prix - Go-karts. Parties. End of semester. Need we say more? [While I love go-kart races...]
- Get a milkshake at Pappy's - A Purdue tradition since the Union opened, a Pappy's milkshake is the perfect way to celebrate. [Milkshakes are always a perfect way to celebrate.]
- Tailgate before a football game - A picnic with wheels, Purdue tailgaiting is as much of a tradition as the football game itself. When else can a cold beverage, a pack of hot dogs and a charcoal grill make a meal taste so good? [Nope.]
- Take a road trip for Spring Break - Sometimes, West Lafayette seems a million miles from nowhere. Spring Break is the time to prove it. Grab some friends, pile in the car and hit the road. Four days later, turn around and come back. [My sophomore year I went north with Joey Adams to Ann Arbor, then he dropped me off in Chicago to visit with my old roommate Enio Rigolin. It was snowing on the way in and his windshield wiper stopped working. Junior year - Grandma Ahlrichs died just before spring break and so I drove to Iowa for her funeral and stayed to help my mom and uncles with things. Senior year - off to Florida with the Deadbeets. On the way back, we hit a flying goose.]
- Have Breakfast Special at XXX - Eggs, toast, potatoes, meat - served almost anyway you want them. At 3 a.m., it's the best meal in West Lafayettte and a testament to the staying power of Indiana's oldest drive-in restaurant. [I've eaten so many meals at the the Triple-X. Breakfast-special-over-hard-wheat-toast-no-meat* still rolls off the tongue. This last weekend on our way down to Southern Indiana, I made Erica stop in with me for a grilled-cheese with an egg on it and a root beer frost.]
- Attend a callout for the free pizza - There may be no such thing as a free lunch, but attending a student organization's callout strictly for the free pizza and soft drinks is the next best thing. [I joined a few student organizations, but if we're talking just for the free pizza, that'd be a SS Voyager callout. Geeks.]
- Skip class - Somewhere on this campus is a person who has never missed a day of class. We applaud your efforts, but knock it off. Skipping class should never be a priority, but how often is there a sunny Friday afternoon? Get out there and enjoy it. [Mom don't read this -- I skipped so many classes. And if I did go to a big lecture class, I was usually reading a book in the back.]
- Visit Bruce Barker, the Piano Man - West Lafayette's one man show, Bruce Barker has been entertaining at the Neon Cactus for years. Lift your cup, sing along and don't get called on stage. [Nope.]
- Rub Lincoln's nose - Reportedly a purveyor of good luck, rubbing the nose on the bust of Abraham Lincoln in the north wing of the Union has been a tradition of many worried students. [It's good luck? Dammit -- why didn't I know that when I was there?]
- Go to an IU-PU basketball game - One of the biggest rivalries in college basketball, the Indiana-Purdue basketball game is your chance to really show how you really feel about the Hoosiers. [Nope.]
- Pull an all-nighter - A college tradition, the all-nighter is usually fueled by gallons of coffee, a fear of failing and a penchant for procrastination. Leaving Purdue without staying up all night studying at least once isn't getting your money's worth. Save your sleeping for class. [Can I double-bold this one? Many was the time I went into the labs in the basement of MATH as the sun was setting and came out when it was coming up.]
- Spit a cricket at Bug Bowl - Spitting not your thing? Don't worry, with cockroach races, chocolate-covered grasshopers and fried mealworms, Bug Bowl is sure to have something to satisfy your hunger for adventure. [I've been to Bug Bowl, but never spit a cricket. Be my guest.]
- Attend the PMO Christmas show - Whether you're Jewish, Muslim, Hindu or Christian, the Christmas Show should be celebrated for what it is - a great show put on by the kids who sit next to you in class. Support them. [My aunt Kris took me one year.]
- Go ice skating at Tappawingo Park - The ice rink is the perfect way to enjoy the winter climate. [Sigh. Another activity that was simply unavailable when I was at Purdue.]
- Watch the Glee Club - The Varsity Glee Club might be the most entertaining student organization at Purdue. With their perfect harmonies and crazy antics, you'll forget every glee club joke you've ever heard. [I've seen the West Side High glee club -- does that count?]
- Stand during the football game - Standing in the student section at Ross-Ade stadium should be a prerequisite for getting a Purdue degree. Get to the game, dance to the band, cheer on the team, and show some school spirit - you'll never be able to buy tickets so cheaply again. [Cheaply? And here's where my aged-grandfather routine pays off -- when I was a freshman, football tickets were free! Even I'll go to a football game if it's free.]
- Walk at graduation - For four or five years you've hoofed it all over Purdue's campus. Dust off the shoes and take a couple extra steps - graduation is your day, enjoy it with your classmates by walking across the Elliott Hall of Music stage and getting your degree. [Nope. I've been to someone else's graduation* and I did complete my degree, but it just didn't seem worth it to sit through 2000 other people walking across the stage.]
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