The Outliers Frequently Asked Questions

Q: What is an 'outlier'?

A: In statistics, an outlier is a data point that deviates so widely from the mass of your data that it can safely be ignored.

Q: Can I get the Outliers radio shows for my public or commerical radio station?

A: Sure. Please contact Fuzzy Gerdes at fuzzy@fuzzyco.com.

Q: Kierkagaard said that every individual must carry his own teleology with him. But, in a world lacking even the appearence of ontological constants, there is no medium through which the individual can so move. How do you resolve this dilema?

A: By seperating the ultimate from the conventional. While it is true that all answers are ultimatly teleological in nature, we must also accept that just as we effect the environment, so the environment effects us. In essence, we are subject to conventions which, for practical intents and purposes, can serve as ontological constants. These can be overcome, precisely because they are only conventions, but that does not mean that they are irrelevent to questions of our existence. Personal honesty in self-examination will lead to the connection between the ultimate teleology and the conventional ontology.

Q: The water that comes out of my faucet is all black and yecchy. What do I do?

A: As the world environment becomes subjected to further and further industrial degredation, we can only expect additional manifestations of this imbalance. Our suggestions are as follows: first, get a basic understanding of ecosystems, preferably by a review of the basics in the literature, such as Epstein's book "Conquest of the Waterways: modern industrialists as 18th century pirates," and Indaram's article "Post-colonial Air Pollution and the Rhetoric of Forrest Fire Imperialism," in the Journal of Rhetorology. An MA in environmental sciences would also be helpful. Once you have finished, start drinking soda.

Q: I can't find my mother. Do you know where she is?

A: Motherhood, as a construct, raises many troubling questions about our relationships to one another, as a social text. Are we dealing with a biological imperative or a social contract? What elements do we turn to when seeking to legitimize this relationship? Perhaps you should rethink your question at a fundamental level: it may not be so much a question of "where" as of "why."

Q: I understand that the Outliers hunted Nazis in South America during the 1970s. As a result, there are now much fewer Nazis in that area of the world today than there were 50 years ago. Coupled with the destruction of the rainforest, and the dissapearence of related species such as the Amazon water crescent, how you justify your role in the elimination of environmental diversity?

A: A very good question. Evidence presented at the time had indicated to us that the influx of German Nazis into South America was, in fact, creating an imbalance in the local ecosystem, threatening such native species as the Amazon water crest and the Brazillian three-toed toad. While we now realize that, in fact, the Nazis played a perfectly compatible role within the eco- system, acting as tourists and creating lebensraum, liberal environmental policy at the time seemed to dictate that the Nazis be hunted down in order to reduce their potentially crippling impact on the native species. In our own defense, it should be noted as well that the Nazis have done damage to the native Jewish species of the region - a damage whose effects can not be explained by the El Nino weather pattern, as some apologists would have it.

Q: Do you know what I'm going to do to you if you come near my sister again?

A: Yes. Paradoxically, however, telling you what you would do could change your action; this is an illustration of Heisenberg's uncertainty principle, and a demonstration of why an individual who is part of a system can never have total knowledge of that system.

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