Impress This Apes Finale

Seth Dodson

So, Impress These Apes season 3 is finally over, with Seth Dodson the deserved winner. It was a really talented and enthusiastic bunch, but Seth really nailed it every week, bringing in odd, hilarious and oddly-honest performances every week.

I was happy that I was able to hop on stage for a moment in the show: in a bit that may have made more sense on paper than on stage, contestants from previous seasons played alternate-reality versions of the Apes. There was Placate These Pigs and Delight These Dogs, the latter hosted by myself as Spelling Bee Host.

But the real talk of the evening, even overshadowing Seth's win, was Alan Metoskie's tattoo. Alan showed a video chronicling his adventure getting a huge back tattoo, which was revealed at the end of the video, and then by Alan standing onstage shirtless, to be a large "Impressed?". There were some "hmmm" moments in the video, like the fact that you never actually saw skin being tattooed, but Alan was so convincing, and it was just plausable enough (I mean, if it had been the Apes logo, I would have been sure it wasn't real) that most people (myself included) were convinced. Even after the show, at Brendan's Pub‎ next door, Alan continued to talk about details of the tattooing process and the negotiation with the tattoo artist and so on.

Alan Metoskie

It was, of course, a fake tattoo.

As someone who has actually gotten a tattoo for a show, I'm a little annoyed that the notion was co-opted by a faker. But I have to be honest with myself that really I'm chagrined that I was taken in by the prank. Which then means that I need to give credit to the prankster. So, yes, Alan Metoskie, I'm impressed.

Erica reminisces about her Apes Finale from season 1
My ridiculous act from the finale of season 2